Miri turns 15

Dearest first daughter,

In true Shea fashion your birthday will not be just one day. It started last night with your massive cake and daddy's chili pie. In a little while we take you to a football game and to try the new chinese restaurant. Your grandpa and grandma are coming to town to celebrate with us. Next week we will do your bonfire party with friends and you will get the rest of your presents, and of course another cake. Remember though you did not get flowers from me last night, you did get diamonds. Anyone who knows you will laugh because of course you deserve nothing less!

I want most of all to thank you for being my daughter and letting me be your mother. I know I am not a typical mother and as I often told you, my children did not come with rule books, and I am doing the best I can along the way. I know that we expect more from you than many parents, but you set the bar on that one kid, you always expected more out of yourself. It seems like yesterday I was meeting with your kindergarden teacher. I recall her saying it was test time and she heard you talking and came up behind you to hear you say, "I can not make the same mistake, I can not make the same mistake".

When you were little I always said you were hell on wheels. You refused to change for anyone and almost got thrown out of pre school. You had no intentions of being put in the early reader class if it meant missing time in the gymnasium. I was certain that you would be suspended in elementary school too. You got in so many fights! However, they were for defending others and standing up to bullies. I don't remember you ever fighting for yourself.

That was how I raised you. I knew God gave you an extra loud voice, so I taught you to use it for good. I never knew it would be to hit so many boys though! Somehow for you it worked. The bus drivers never punished you, and the teachers looked the other way. You were always loved, and people were afraid to pick on others in front of you because they knew they would get knocked around a bit. I'm happy though to see it is happening less, and you are using your wit to defend people now instead of your fists.

15 years goes by in the blink of an eye. I am having a hard time seeing you grow up, and you are having a hard time being patient with me. For your entire life I have been trying to protect you, and you always seem to be yelling that you can do it quite nicely on your own. You never held my hand when you learned to walk, and you did not ask for help unless you had exhausted every other option. One day you will learn that my will is just as strong as yours. Maybe you will slow down a little and hear my voice from time to time.

I love you Miri. Having you has made me a better person. Seeing your strength has made me proud, but always know that I am here to be strong for you too. Your years may increase, but I will always be your mother, and you are my baby. No one can take your place. You are my first daughter, the first child I ever loved as a mother. You are beautiful, kind, smart, and a child of God. From the moment I gave birth to you, I promised you back to him. Slow down baby, and always remember that you don't have to be perfect. He is perfect enough for all of us.

Momma