http://smilesandtrials.blogspot.com/2010/02/57-things.html
I borrowed this from Christine's blog. Her answers are in the link above.
1. Shea was from a lawyer friend who got my hell raising hippie dad out of trouble.
2. My mother was as wild as they came. She dated bikers, drank, smoked(not just cigarettes either lol). Most of that was before I was born, most of it.
3. My mother wanted me to be different than her. She sent me to a strict Pentecostal school as a child. I did not get to wear pants until I was 9 and went to public school.
4. I have no contact with any of my bio family other than my brother whom I raised.
5. I only knew my bio grandmother. My paternal grandparents passed away before I was born and my maternal grandfather left when my mom was 2 and she never saw him again.
6. My grandmother was adopted from an orphanage in Memphis tn when she was 4. She never had any desire to find her bio family. She adored her adoptive father.
7. Alcohol has little effect on me, so I choose to rarely drink.
8. I learned to swim when I was 12 by jumping in the deep end of a pool and hoping for the best.
9. When I was 5 my mom bought me a real ruby ring. I lost it by pretending to get married to a neighborhood boy. She offered all the kids $50 if they found it, but no one did :(
10. I am a Christian
11. I was baptized when I was 18.
12. I adore buttered popcorn salt taffy, but I can't find it anymore.
13. I love the beach and mountains.
14. I'm always cold.
15. Pink Floyd is my favorite band.
16. I never have any money in my wallet.
17. I want to write a book.
18. I believe that my children will change the world and make it a better place.
19. My kids stick up for anyone getting picked on.
20. I've been with my husband since I was 16, and that's a long time, really long time.
21. I would have been a better single person. I'm hard to live with.
22. Everything is black and white to me. Right is right, and wrong is wrong.
23. I seriously considered giving my first daughter up for adoption and had a family picked out for her. I was 16 when I got pregnant with her.
24. I think about that family a lot and hope they were able to be parents.
25. I was so scared I would not be good enough for my daughter. I wanted her to have the best. She is the best daughter anyone could want.
26. She thinks I am too hard on her.
27. I am, but I promised God when she was born that I would raise her to love him and obey him.
28. My daughter still doesn't know her own worth. Sometimes I dream of her being able to see the beauty in her like I do. She is such a good person and so much stronger than me.
29. I was scared something would go wrong during my whole preg. with A.J. I just did not think I could be lucky enough to have two healthy daughters.
30. I want to go to Italy. That is the only place in Europe I ever wanted to go.
31. I love anything covered in gravy.
32. I need a red corvette. Every time I get close to affording one, I have another child.
33. If A.J. was a boy she would have been named corvin lol.
34. I am really good at rummy.
35. I wanted to be in the peace corp when I was younger.
36. I'm not sure I am going to let my kids date. I see nothing wrong with them waiting until they are 18.
37. I like to cook with my kids.
37. I have talks with the kids about politics, taxes, and all sorts of things.
38. I can't live without my fax machine. I use it all the time.
39. I really like my job, and I think I am pretty decent at it too.
40. I never pay full price for anything.
41. I could eat pasta every day.
42. Soul food is my favorite type of food. Nothing beats fried yam patties and a corn bread pancake.
43. I don't pay attention to race very much though it seems the world does.
44. I hate reverse racism and affirmative action. I think they are the same thing.
45. I miss Memphis and how it smells on a summer night.
46. I think God is up there shaking his head at us. He gave us a rule book and we still mess it up.
47. I sang karaoke on Beale street many years ago. I was scared to death. I sang a r&b song by Kelly Price.
48. I want to move to Arizona or Florida.
49. I miss my husband every second that he is away from me. I wish he felt the same way.
50. I teach my kids that a person does not have to be married to be happy.
51. I would not be disappointed at all if my kids chose to be single.
52. They know I only have one request of them. If they marry, marry a Christian.
53. I refuse to use one of those straightening thingies on my hair. It's too much work and they look really weird. I got what God gave me. It's as straight as he wants it.
54. I sleep on my side and never facing anyone.
55. I take really hot baths.
56. I just recently started liking the color brown.
57. I make no apologies for what I believe. I am who I am. If someone doesn't like me, I could care less. I worked really hard to be this screwed up, and I like myself just fine. It took me 31 years to figure this out.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
O continues to do very well. He had steak during the superbowl and LOVED it. I think he would eat it every day if I could afford to feed it to him. HE has grown 2 centimeters in height but not gained any weight. Personally I think he runs everything off. In a few months he will be evaluated for adhd. His little body is so excited all the time, and he literally bounces off the walls. We have been off school for several days due to the snow and he misses his routine as well. The girls are doing well in school and love their brother very much. We are all eagerly awaiting spring and the banishment of this Siberia type weather!!
Saturday, January 30, 2010
My husband is getting me a dog for Valentines. He doesn't know that I know though. Yes, it was a dog I asked for about 4 or 5 years ago, but I have since gotten two dogs. I only do rescue dogs, and this is one he has bought, so I am not sure how I feel about this. I really have enough between 4 kids, 2 dogs, 1 hermit crab, working full time, and keeping up with everything around here. I told him for the last year that I did not EVER want to add another dog to this family. Two is plenty, and besides, Wendy my beagle/basset has issues getting along with other dogs anyway. It's a delicate mix getting our two to get along and this is all just driving me NUTS. Oh, did I mention it's a puppy. Unlike most women I don't like puppies or babies. I love dogs and I love kids, I just don't like them when they are little. I mean I like them in small increments. I recently baby sat for Andy's girlfriend, and it was my idea. Her little baby was great, but it was also nice to send him home after about 5 hours. If I could give birth to children when they were about 4 years old, I would have 12 of them by now. I really can not see any way out of this. If I tell him no I hurt his feelings. If I keep it, I'll be more nuts than I already am.......... Why can't men ever get it right? He could have made a donation to reecesrainbow and it would have made me so happy. P.S. if any of you women readers out there want to tell me how perfect your hubbies are, please don't lol.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
The things they never tell you about adoption
When you first begin the process of adoption, you begin being educated. In order to pass a home study and be Hague qualified, prospective parents take many hours of classes on children. A good portion always deals with bonding. They warn you that it takes time and patience to bond. There are always suggestions on how to facilitate the process and make things easier. Mostly though I remember my classes as well as other parents warning me about the unknowns. We are all told that their will be unexpected health issues, behavior problems, and not to loose faith. For certain adoption is HARD. Nothing ever goes as planned. Paperwork is lost, things are left out, and it ALWAYS costs more that what they tell you. No one tells you that last part though lol.
So going into adoption and having been fully warned, I took everything I heard with a grain of salt. The only thing I knew for certain was that my son had a smile that could charm a serpent and that God brought me to him. I came with very little expectations. I wanted only one thing, and that was to let him know that I accepted him on his terms and for who he was.
I worked my ass off trying to learn Eesti because how could I expect a child to learn my language without giving him the same respect? I can truly say that I know as much Eesti as he does English. It's not a lot, but I did try. No told me to do that, I just wanted to.
So this brings me back to my title, what they don't tell you. So I told you how I was forewarned about everything, but there was so much that got left out. No one told me that I could love like this. No one told me that seeing my son smile even after 2 months would take my breath away. No one told me that I would think my son was the most handsome boy in the world. No one told me that he would try to buy me flowers, carry my groceries, or warn me to turn on my windshield wipers at the first sign of rain drops. No one told me that a 5 year old boy would crawl up in my lap, give me Eskimo kisses, and nuzzle his head against my neck. No one told me that even when he acted up or misbehaved that I really would not care.
No one told me in less than 3 months I could love like this. I was not warned that it would feel like he has always been here. No one told me that I would walk through hell if it meant making him happy. Most of all, I was not told that it was possible that he could really love me so soon. With all the warnings about bonding, I never knew that he would hold me so tight, squeal even when I came back in the room 5 minutes later, or that he would let me rock him and tell him that he belongs to me and I to him. No one told me he would smile each time I said, "Oskar Daniel you are mine".
The most important thing that has stayed consistent is that all of this was meant to be. From the beginning I knew my son was born on the other side of the world. I was born to be his mother, and he was waiting for me to bring him home. From the moment I saw his picture I have belonged to Oskar. He is my heart, and on the hardest of days, he makes it all okay. All of my children are treasured gifts, and each of them thank me for their brother often. I never knew it would feel so right. I never knew a little boy could change my world the way he did. I do not worry the way I used to. I do not stress about money or bills. Most of all I am not afraid. My Oskar is not afraid, so I try hard to be strong like my son. He makes me a better person, wife, and mother. He is everything I wanted and exactly what I needed.
So going into adoption and having been fully warned, I took everything I heard with a grain of salt. The only thing I knew for certain was that my son had a smile that could charm a serpent and that God brought me to him. I came with very little expectations. I wanted only one thing, and that was to let him know that I accepted him on his terms and for who he was.
I worked my ass off trying to learn Eesti because how could I expect a child to learn my language without giving him the same respect? I can truly say that I know as much Eesti as he does English. It's not a lot, but I did try. No told me to do that, I just wanted to.
So this brings me back to my title, what they don't tell you. So I told you how I was forewarned about everything, but there was so much that got left out. No one told me that I could love like this. No one told me that seeing my son smile even after 2 months would take my breath away. No one told me that I would think my son was the most handsome boy in the world. No one told me that he would try to buy me flowers, carry my groceries, or warn me to turn on my windshield wipers at the first sign of rain drops. No one told me that a 5 year old boy would crawl up in my lap, give me Eskimo kisses, and nuzzle his head against my neck. No one told me that even when he acted up or misbehaved that I really would not care.
No one told me in less than 3 months I could love like this. I was not warned that it would feel like he has always been here. No one told me that I would walk through hell if it meant making him happy. Most of all, I was not told that it was possible that he could really love me so soon. With all the warnings about bonding, I never knew that he would hold me so tight, squeal even when I came back in the room 5 minutes later, or that he would let me rock him and tell him that he belongs to me and I to him. No one told me he would smile each time I said, "Oskar Daniel you are mine".
The most important thing that has stayed consistent is that all of this was meant to be. From the beginning I knew my son was born on the other side of the world. I was born to be his mother, and he was waiting for me to bring him home. From the moment I saw his picture I have belonged to Oskar. He is my heart, and on the hardest of days, he makes it all okay. All of my children are treasured gifts, and each of them thank me for their brother often. I never knew it would feel so right. I never knew a little boy could change my world the way he did. I do not worry the way I used to. I do not stress about money or bills. Most of all I am not afraid. My Oskar is not afraid, so I try hard to be strong like my son. He makes me a better person, wife, and mother. He is everything I wanted and exactly what I needed.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Sometimes I think about what my life could have been like without O in it, and I cringe. It's amazing to me in just a matter of months that I could love someone so very much. In my eyes, he can do very little wrong. He is the most perfect child God could have ever given to me. It feels so good to have my babies all close and taken care of. All of my children are gifts from God, and I adore them all.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Just got back from A.J's pee wee cheerleading at the basketball game. My adorable son informed me he would NOT dance to musica(cheer), he did not like basketball, and he is going to play football. After it was over, he gave A.J. a big kiss and told her, "good job A.J.". Oskar also received a note home today from his teacher. She said that he had a wonderful day and was calm all day. He is playing better with the children. When I picked him up the after school caregiver had given him a yellow balloon which made him very happy. All opf my kiddos are doing wonderful. Miranda was also invited to join the junior honor society, and Andy has found a sweet girl he cares very much about.
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